Why the Sleep Deprived Should Not be Making the Decisions

To say we had some trouble naming this last baby would be a wee bit of an understatement. I wish we had our happily ever after where that's concerned, but I'm not so sure. That's the root of the problem really, I'm not so sure.

Once we had narrowed down to Theo and Graham, I figured we'd just sort of know after we sat on it for a few days. Didn't happen. Jeremy, who I'm sure thought he was being accommodating and helpful, was great with either name. The kids were split. Duncan and Marley liked Theo, and Gabriel preferred Graham. So it came down to me.

My first choice was and still is Graham. I have loved this name for a long time. I grew up hearing it since it was the name of one of my dad's friends and past business associates. He and his family let our family use their vacation cottage in Nova Scotia a few times growing up which made for some great vacations and memories. This Graham also worked with the British government alongside Margaret Thatcher, and ended up being knighted. So then it was always Sir Graham after that, which upped the awesome factor in my mind.

I planned on at least some of the time, nicknaming the baby Grey for short, also positively associated with something in my childhood. My hands-down-no-contest best years of school were grades 6-8, when I attended a tiny private school called Grey Gables. Just hearing or saying the name still makes me smile.

The problem came 10 days in once we actually turned in his papers with "Graham Jack" on them. I was initially happy with it, but 2 and a half days later, I couldn't take it anymore. With just the few people we told, it was already being pronounced wrong. Well, wrong to me. In Canada (and some other countries and states), it's pronounced "Grey-em" or "Grey-um", with two distinct syllables. Here in Utah, most people say "Gram". That's what I have called my Gramma for years. You can't call my baby boy Gram.

He's already going to run into correcting pronunciation all the time with our last name, and I didn't want him to have to do it with his first name too. So back we went. Mulling it over. In a last minute decision, just hours before his baby blessing, we decided to go with Theo, which we really do like, and keep Graham as the second name so we had the option to use it if we changed our minds again. Theo is a good boy or man name, and has a wonderful meaning as the short form of Theodore which means "gift of God". So fitting for this boy.

But then everybody was calling him Theo, and I wondered why we even kept Graham in there since nobody's using it. It's just going to mean one more name he has to write on forms for his whole life. I still call him Theo Grey much of the time, and honestly, I still think of him as Graham in my mind. I'm second guessing myself all over the place, and I have no idea if there's a way to settle it and then just leave well enough alone.

All the other kids' names just came and then just fit. I didn't expect to struggle, ever, with naming my child. He's six weeks old today. I'm still sleep deprived, and still wondering if I've made the right choice. Maybe Marley's got something- she was calling him Snuggers the other day (well, Thnuggerth, the way she says it). I'm sure he wouldn't hate us at all for using that one.

For All of us Parent Types

Yes, this is a post that's a link to someone else's post. But it's so good. And I just had a baby and am getting no sleep, so give me a break. Geesh.

Motherhood Is a Calling (And Where Your Children Rank)